Sunday, May 25, 2008

The 45,376,235,237th Time Someone Called Someone Else the Antichrist

Last night I received an e-mail forward. I often get them, especially ones that are keen on Jesus or begging me to not purchase gasoline on a specific date. The one I received last night was really astounding— I had no idea that Barack Obama was the Antichrist.

According to The Book of Revelations:The Anti-Christ will be a man, in his 40s, of MUSLIM descent, who will deceive the nations with persuasive language, and have a MASSIVE Christ-like appeal....the prophecy says that people will flock to him and he will promise false hope and world peace, and when he is in power, he will destroy everything.And Now: For the award winning Act of Stupidity Of all times the People of America want to elect, to the most Powerful position on the face of the Planet -- The Presidency of the United states of America A Muslim Male Extremist Between the ages of 17 and 40.


Aside from the absurdity of the Obama/Muslim thing (and the sub-Junior High writing and syntax—what’s with the weird capitalization? Was this badly translated from German or what?), I was astounded by the complete lack of regard for the actual biblical text. First of all, it is the Book of Revelation, not “Revelations”. Minor, sure, but if you really think it to be the word of God, you ought to proofread. More importantly, the term Antichrist is not even in the Book of Revelation. It appears only in John I and John II and is used to describe any person who denies that Jesus is the son of God. So by my count, there are a few billion Antichrists—and even so, Obama isn’t one of them.

Of course, the police APB bit about being a Muslim man in his 40’s doesn’t appear anywhere (even allowing generously for allegory). This is just racist tripe that the author typed (presumably with his or her knuckles). Hell, Jessie Helms thinks the Antichrist will be Jewish. Something tells me his buddy John Hagee would agree.

If I had a book that I thought was the word of a magical, all-powerful and all-knowing super-being, I think I’d read it. A lot. Or at least actually leaf through it before I quoted it.

My head hurts. But for fun, you can play the Antichrist Quiz Game on the PBS website.