Friday, September 05, 2008

2008 NFL Preview--NFC

A day late and a dollar short on this one. Still, the outcome of last night's less-than-stellar opening NFL game didn't change anything for me, so here we are.

NFC East: The second toughest division is easily the most repugnant; this remains unchanged from years past.

Dallas Cowboys (12-4): I’m really happy the Cowboys have done so well over the last few years. The better they do in the regular season, the dumber they look in their playoff losses. Fingers crossed that we get a hat trick of post-season ineptitude.

New York Giants (10-6): The unlikely champs won’t come close to repeating. Why? Two words: Eli. You say that’s only one word? I guess I’m as smart as Eli.

Philadelphia Eagles (8-8): Whose turn is it to take the blame for the Eagles’ poor play? I predict it will be Westbrook’s turn. Doing everything on offense isn’t enough anymore.

Washington Redskins (5-11): I can’t believe these guys are still going with Jason Campbell. Don’t they know they have Todd Collins on the roster?

NFC North: I’m gunning for Aaron Rogers to do well and shove it in Favre’s face, but it seems like Minnesota’s year.

Minnesota Vikings (11-5): Tavarius Jackson totally sucks but, like the Ravens of a bygone day, their defense will win them the division.

Green Bay Packers (9-7): The North is a tough division and Rogers first starts aren’t all going to be peaches and cream. Barring this injury that people seem so sure about, he’ll show a lot of promise for this young team.

Detroit Lions (7-9): With Rudi Johnson on board, we’re going to see a whole new game. Still a losing game, but it’ll be a new one.

Chicago Bears (4-12): Orton Era Version 4.0 begins. Have fun throwing to Devin Hester. I hear he’s good at catching them on the bounce.

NFC South: This division reminds me of the SEC in college football: boring and overrated.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (9-7): Is there a coach that looks smarmier than Gruden (besides Spurier, I guess)? They’re lucky the division sucks and that their schedule’s easy. They’ll run neck in neck with Carolina.

Carolina Panthers (9-7): They’re a solid team and, with the addition of Jonathon Stewart, they should make a run for the playoffs. Go Ducks!

New Orleans Saints (7-9): They aren’t that bad of team all around but with the albatross of Reggie Bush on their backs (the Mark Teixeira of the NFL, maybe?), they just can’t win.

Atlanta Falcons (4-12): It’s going to be a bumpy ride for Matt Ryan. Can you say “Tim Couch?”

NFC West: Nearly as disgusting as the East, this is the kind of division where I’m rooting for a lot of 0-0 ties.

Seattle Seahawks (10-6): Seattle must be the luckiest team in the NFL. No matter how far they decline, the rest of the division falls with them. They’re de facto winners every year and might as well not play the games.

Arizona Cardinals (8-8): You know you’re a sad sack of a franchise when they’ll consider two .500 seasons in a row(!) success.

St. Louis Rams (7-9): They shouldn’t be that bad, but they are. Marc Bulger is done and they just paid Stephen Jackson through long after effectiveness.

San Francisco 49ers (4-12): J.T. O’Sullivan?! I lived in Davis, CA and I’ve seen how well the Aggies play. This is not professional work.