I usually can't stand Ken Rosenthal's baseball reports (in which he will tie in the Yankees any and every way he can, even when they are totally irrelevant to the topic he is allegedly covering).
That said, this "Diary of the 2009 Yankee season" is pretty funny, and does a good job of pointing out some of the Yankees' big question marks going into the season (how's that bullpen going to be? How likely is a Burnett injury? What about an aging team? A-Rod?).
This part is extremely funny, in part because it's true, and in part because it will never happen:
"Derek Jeter fails to stop two slow grounders up the middle while Rangers shortstop Elvis Andrus makes several acrobatic plays at the Stadium, prompting a barrage of post-game questions."
Yeah, right - the New York media questioning Jeter's range? If they haven't bothered to ask in the past few years when an increasing number of balls went up the "middle" of the infield and as Jeter had to jump on almost every play in order to put enough power behind his throw to first, I really don't see why they would start now.
Still, if even Ken Rosenthal is acknowleding Jeter's range is, erm - not so great? - then I guess stranger things could happen.